


Paint Pallets

by The_Sa1tiest_CarameL



Series: CarameL's procrastination pieces [1]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Author is a Clay | Dream Apologist (Video Blogging RPF), Blood and Gore, Blood and Injury, Clay | Dream Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream Needs a Hug (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Crying, Gen, Heavy Angst, Hurt Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt No Comfort, I Made Myself Cry, I came up with this concept while in the fricken shower, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Isolation, Long-Haired Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Men Crying, Not Beta Read, Pain, Painting, Pandora's Vault, Prison, Protective Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Sad Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Sad Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Sad TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Self-Harm, Suffering, The Author Regrets Everything, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, i have favoritism towards Dream and Techno and I'm not ashamed of it, oh no, sapnap is there for like five seconds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 06:02:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29255643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Sa1tiest_CarameL/pseuds/The_Sa1tiest_CarameL
Summary: Dream picks up an old hobby while in Pandora's Vault.(yo there's a bunch of blood here so please be careful if you're sensitive to graphic depictions of self-harm and things like that, 'kay?)
Relationships: Clay | Dream & Sam | Awesamdude, Clay | Dream & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Technoblade & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF)
Series: CarameL's procrastination pieces [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2163213
Comments: 120
Kudos: 1303
Collections: Completed stories I've read, Dream SMP fics





	Paint Pallets

**Author's Note:**

> This idea just came to me while I was in the shower and wouldn't let me be-

_Dream was sitting on a bench near the community house, a sketchbook and quill in hand. He had always been fond of painting when he had free time, even if he thought that he wasn't that good. Currently, Dream was painting the wooden pathway in front of him, trying to capture the beauty of the sunlight reflecting off of crystal clear waters and the gentle sway of nearby trees._

_"Ooooh, that looks grea-"_

_The sudden appearance of a voice from behind him made Dream yelp out in surprise as he flinched and bolted upright, causing the ink he had been using to spill over the bench._

_His annoyed gaze(although no one could see it through his enchanted porcelain mask) was directed towards the sheepish grin of Sapnap, who had shrunk in on himself after seeing how he spooked the other, his auburn eyes avoiding the dotted ones on the admin's mask._

_"Heh.... uh, oops?"_

_The ravenette could just feel the look of pure exasperation present on Dream's face without even seeing it. He had always wondered how he managed to do that -_

_"Whaddya want?"_

_"Geez, so **rude-"** -a swift elbow to the gut- "Listen, I just wanted to say that you're actually really good at art, Dream! I really like that picture that you were painting."_

_Dream subconsciously turned the page away from Sapnap's prying eyes, embarrassed. He personally didn't think it was all that good- but then again, they all say that an artist's biggest critic is themselves._

_"U- uh, thanks, Sap. I appreciate it."_

_The ravenette smiled brightly before giving Dream an affectionate punch on the shoulder and skipping away, the speedrunner rolling his eyes fondly at his friend's childish antics._

_He then directed his attention back to the unfinished painting, which rested comfortably in his slender arms. Dream let a soft, relaxed smile rest on his lips before taking the now mostly empty ink container and bringing it back into the community house to get refilled. He'd finish the painting after the got more ink._

___•^•___

Dream stared off into the distance as he sat huddled in the far left corner of his cell. His eyes had long since dulled after spending so long in isolation, and the shattered clock on the floor couldn't give him the time anymore. He didn't really mind, though. The ticking had gotten annoying after a while and knowing the time was useless when you knew that you'd be trapped forever in an obsidian box.

Instead of entertaining himself through his pure, undeniable rage at himself and that stupid clock, Dream had found other ways to have some fun, or at least keep him busy.

The first game he came up with had been dubbed 'What a Banger!!'. The goal was to see how many times Dream could hit his head on the wall until he passed out. He tried to get more hits in each time he respawned, but sometimes he'd wake up and wouldn't be able to move because the world had turned into a spiral of dark purple and glowing orange.

The second game he came up with was named 'Under the Sea'. This one's primary goal was for Dream to stick his head in the water and see how long he could stay under. Some days he swore that he had seen a fish swimming around in there, and he eventually named it Guppers. Dream had told Sam this and the creeper hybrid looked at him like he was crazy. The older even checked the water for Guppers, and told Dream that there were no fish or anything of the sort in it. Dream just dismissed Sam, saying that the fish was probably scared of him and hiding.

The third activity Dream created was 'Warm n' Cozy'. The concept of this game was fairly simple: Dream would jump into the lava surrounding his little abode and just lay there until he respawned, enjoying the feeling that the hot liquid had on his skin. At first, it was terrifying getting into the lava, and Dream had screamed for what seemed like an eternity before finally dying. The burns that were left on his arms and neck were vile, the skin pulsing with puss as a feeble attempt to fix up the wounds. His skin felt like it was on fire even after he had drowned himself in the water multiple times, but eventually he got used to it. After a couple more times, Dream's flesh was scorched and he couldn't feel the pain anymore, so he began jumping into the lava as if it were just a normal pool of water.

...After a while, however, these games became a bit redundant. Dream couldn't feel the blood zipping to his head as he slammed it into the obsidian, couldn't feel his lungs filling up with water as Guppers stared blankly at him, couldn't feel the scorching warmth of the lava as he did backstrokes in it. Dream needed something new. Something **different.**

It was a normal day ~~(night?)~~ in the cell, it's one inmate staring blankly at the ceiling once more. His eyes turned to the shards of broken glass sitting innocently on the floor when he got an idea. Maybe this would distract him. ~~~~

Dream dragged himself over to where the glass was, lazily grabbing a large piece of it and admiring it's sharp, refined edges. Suddenly, he stabbed it into his left arm and watched with a crazed smile on his face as the thick, sticky crimson stored in it began to flow freely down his limb, dripping onto the cold floor with an quiet _splash._

His smile grew bigger as he carefully guided his finger across the small puddle of blood, smearing it onto one of his legs and eventually making a smiley face with it. 

This gave him an idea.

Dream excitedly began to pull some of his hair out, bundling it up into a small pointed wad. Grabbing some of the wood from the broken clock, he carefully carved the piece of wood with his fingernails before tying the clump of hair to it and making sure it wouldn't fall off. Dream then lifted up his new 'paintbrush' and smiled at his work. 

He then looked over at the now larger puddle of blood next to him and dipped the brush in it, letting the tip glide across a piece paper from one of the books sitting in the room. Dream made trees and hills and flowers until he ran out of his 'red paint', grinning widely at his new game. 

He'd call it 'Painting Pastime'.

____•^•____

Tommy fidgeted nervously as he stood at the entrance to the prison. From what he heard from Sam, Dream had been acting strange. Well, strange for someone locked away in an obsidian box. The young adult had gotten multiple self-inflicted injuries as well as claiming that he had a pet fish in his little cauldron of water. Tommy had decided long ago that sticking Dream in Pandora's Vault was taking it a step too far, even for him; he felt that throwing Dream in the prison was just as bad as what the man himself had done. The admin already had a bad mindset to begin with, and Tommy couldn't even imagine how difficult it must've been to be trapped in a dark box with nothing but you and the monsters you had inside your head. The mere thought made the teenager shiver.

A hand was placed on his shoulder, making him look to the side to see Technoblade, his brother, staring at him with a rare look of encouragement on his face. The piglin hybrid knew that Tommy was nervous; nervous of what he might see, nervous of what he might _not_ see, and he wanted his younger brother to be assured that he wasn't in this alone. That Techno would be there to support him.

However, he would be lying if he said that he wasn't worried, too. In the many years Technoblade had known Dream, he figured out pretty quickly about Dream's self-destructive tendencies. He knew what Dream would do to himself, given enough time alone.

And that terrified him.

But Techno had to be strong, no matter how much it hurt him. He had to be strong for Tommy, his younger brother that he had learned to cherish and love. He had to be strong for Dream, a friend and comrade that had been fighting his demons for years, broken and battered yet too selfless and stubborn to get anyone else caught in his web of pain. It was one of the many things that Techno wished he would just let go.

Sighing, the piglin hybrid clutched Tommy's hand as the lava separating them and their friend ~~(yeah, friend. They'd do whatever it took to fix the cracks and holes in their relationship, they'd be whole again, just you wait)~~ slowly parted for them to pass through, and the two brothers stepped into the cell.

They both gasped in complete and utter horror.

____•^•____

Dream had gotten really good at this new game, and he loved having something to do. After a bit of persuasion, Sam allowed him to have some glass vials for his 'paints', although the older couldn't get the prisoner to explain why. As long as the other didn't try anything, Sam would allow it.

So, Dream ended up discovering that his body held multiple shades of the pretty red color, some hues ranging from a bright, vibrant poppy to a dark, almost black velvet. Dream tested out different parts of his body, seeing which ones would ooze different shades. After some experimentation, Dream concluded that his forearms let out a bright shade of red while his legs secreted the darker shades. Dream's cheeks probably held the lightest color, the shining liquid cascading down his face like tears.

So Dream filled each vial with the different shades of ~~blood~~ paint that he discovered, eventually ending up with a whole collection. He had to refill each vial about twice a week, but that was part of the game! 

Currently, Dream was painting a picture of a cliff by the sea, wondering if he should put some people gazing at the setting sun. While trying to decide, he saw the lava part out of the corner of his eye and lazily looked up, mouth forming into an 'oh' expression as the stared at the horrified ~~_(why were they horrified? He was just painting-)_~~ faces of Tommyinnit and Technoblade. Huh, what were they doing here?

Tommy's entire body was trembling as his eyes darted back and forth at all the _~~bloody paintings of various places on the server as well as portraits of him and his friends~~_ ingenious masterpieces that were scattered throughout the room, yet to be sorted into a small pile on the far left of the box.

Technoblade's usually monotone and bored orbs were shining with unshed tears as well as pure, unveiled terror as he surveyed the room, dried crimson liquid practically everywhere as some vials of **~~BLOOD~~ **paint Dream had acquired accidentally spilled on the floor sometimes. 

His gaze locked onto the only occupant of the messy, nauseating cell, who looked up at him with a confused expression ~~_**(as if he didn't know what he'd been doing, as if he didn't care that half of the liquid that was supposed to be in his body was instead spread around the walls and floor of the room, displayed for any who dared to**_ **_look_ -)**~~, tilting his head to the side a little. Dozens, maybe even hundreds of cuts big and small littered Dream's battered form, fresh blood still oozing out if some of them. Tommy nearly fell over at the site of the grotesque burns on Dream's neck and arms, skin peeling in multiple places and flesh turning black in other spots, the boy only staying upright due to Techno's firm grip on his shoulder.

"Hello! I didn't expect to see you guys here...!" Tommy nearly burst into sobs at the sound of Dream's way too cheery voice. 

"Hey, you guys actually came at a great time! I've been debating whether I should put some people in this picture here... but now that you've arrived, I know just what to do!"

Techno let a few tears slip from his eyes, heartbroken at the crazed, delirious state Dream was in. He felt like he failed the admin, and wished that he would've known better.

Tommy couldn't keep his composure as shiny, salty tears flowed freely down his cheeks, scarred for life at the way Dream had been living. Why didn't he do anything sooner -?

"Aw, man. I've run out of dark red... Sorry guys, this will only take a moment..."

Techno let out a gasp of shock as Dream yanked a broken piece of glass from the ground and dug it into his leg, jamming it back and forth as red spewed out of the wound and flesh ripped off of the limb, splattering to the floor. Tommy let out a cry as he buried his head in Techno's shoulder, unable to watch anymore. Dream simply started humming the tune to f*cking _Chirp_ as he held a glass vial under his bleeding leg, letting the ~~_**BLOOD BLOOD BLOOD DREAM THAT'S F*CKING BLOOD-**_~~ _paint_ drip into it. Was this what Dream had been doing all these months? Cutting himself and using the blood as a substitute for PAINT???

Techno decided he'd had enough as he marched over to Dream and yanked the piece of glass away from him, earning a yelp of protest from the younger.

"Techno what are you doing?! I need that to do my paintings–!"

The hybrid ignored him as he picked Dream up and carried him towards Tommy, who had recovered just enough to hand Techno a potion that Dream couldn't quite recognize. He held it up to the prisoner's lips, lips that promptly refused to drink the liquid. Dream squirmed in Technoblade's arms, desperately trying to claw his way out.

"N-no!! Wait-! My- my paints, my drawings, m-my paintings, they're all over there!! Please– my whole l-life is back th-there...!"

Tommy couldn't bear to look at Dream's frantic and broken form, instead just locking eyes with Techno and giving him a firm nod. The older pried Dream's mouth open as he stuttered out broken whimpers and pleas to stop, tears streaming down his face like a waterfall. The pain from all his little 'games' came crashing down on him all at once, and he choked out anguished cries and sobs as he struggled in vain to break free from Techno's hold.

The liquid from the strange potion managed to make it down Dream's throat as he coughed and sputtered, desperately trying to get it out. But all his efforts proved to be in vain as he felt himself get tired, battered limbs becoming heavy with exhaustion. Numbly, the fragile and unstable admin gave one last pleading look at Techno before falling limp in his arms, having lost the battle with sleep.

Techno let his gaze flick over to Tommy, who had a wrecked expression on his face after witnessing what Dream probably did to himself on a regular basis. Sighing shakily, Tommy whispered:

"...I had no idea."

Techno just stared sadly at Dream's almost weightless figure, fighting the urge to just burst into tears and mourn the days when the admin would just come to him instead of trying to cope on his own.

"None of us did."

And with that, the duo walked away from Pandora's Vault, silently promising themselves that they'd never let Dream down like this again.

**Author's Note:**

> suffer ;)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [morbid masterpiece](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29384574) by [blueism](https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueism/pseuds/blueism)




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